Anger / Panic

Recently I’ve been thinking about how I’m really not an angry person. When difficult or frustrating or simply inconvenient things happen, I don’t turn to anger. I’m much more likely to panic inwardly, and there’s a 50 percent chance I’ll cry. Is that terrible?

Like, if my flight is delayed 2.5 hours when I already had a 6-hour layover, I’m not going to get angry at the airport employee who has no control over the situation. I may panic about how I’m going to now land in Raleigh at midnight, which means I’ll only get about 5 hours of sleep after I get home and shower because I’ve been traveling for 24 hours and I’m greasy and disgusting, and my work day tomorrow is going to suck—and probably this could cause me to cry. But most likely, I’ll have a momentary panic to myself and then get the fuck over it.

Why dwell on what I can’t change? Why choose anger? Is anger even a choice? Is panic? Maybe some people are just wired to become angry while I’m wired to grow ill with panic?